WRT533: Assignment 3
Paring Down an Introduction
given 1/28 | due 1/30
A few years ago, I was the second author on a paper with several authors. The senior author sent his "final draft" to me for "a quick last read and final okay." This original draft is attached. All of the authors were bursting with their anticipation of having this opus magnum at last submitted to the journal.
I read the draft carefully. It was too long and not well focussed! I was nervous about having my name on it as written. Accordingly, I began to rewrite, starting with the introduction.
In editing, I made several passes through the draft. In each pass, I whittled away on small sets of particular problems. There were many possible ways to do this, and you might reach the same end via a different path.
In class, we’ll go through the steps that I took. Before doing that, I’d like you to become familiar with the raw material, and to attempt an initial edit, following the suggestions below.
Before you begin, understand the following:
- The senior author has agreed with his five coauthors that this article is to be sent to the Journal of Economic Entomology.
- Readership of this Journal is diverse. A unifying theme of the journal is applied research in insect control.
- The readers are primarily professional entomologists.
- The senior author has agreed with his five coauthors that the purpose of the paper is to describe relative differences between pheromones and traps used to monitor the corn earworm. An underlying purpose is to show that there is a need for product regulation in the pheromone and trap industry.
- The corn earworm is a major insect pest, one familiar to most professional entomologists. It can be assumed that anyone reading the article is familiar with this pest.
Assignment (for use in or next class): Read the original introduction. You may use your browser's print button (or, File>Print) to generate a printer-friendly copy. Taking into account the information about the journal and intended readership, use a yellow marker to highlight sections which you might reasonably expect the readers to understand as common knowledge. Strike through or use another color marker to highlight sections which do not pertain to the purpose of the paper.
Having read the introduction and pared down content (in light of the information about readership and purpose given above), find and circle the sentence (or sentences, or fragment of a sentence) that most closely states the nature and scope of the paper (i.e., Day’s 1st requirement for the introduction). Bring the edited text to our next class.
(To look ahead at the editing I actually did, click here!)