You have been sent a request from an editor of the International Journal of Sociobiological Notes to comment on readability of the following. Please take a pencil to this copy, noting problems in style, based on our work in class. Suggest revisions in pencil (margins, between lines on this paper). If you feel that an entire sentence should be reworked, put a circled number at the end of the sentence, and on a separate page, number and rewrite the sentence. We will discuss one author's revision in our next class.
Introduction
This study was undertaken to evaluate the validity of our hypothesis that populations of social species which have failed to maintain a labor caste nevertheless can demonstrate sustainable survivalship capabilities compared to species with a labor caste. Specifically, we hypothesized that Mantela azuli (Meade), a species without social caste or other identifiable class boundaries but one capable of generating larger numbers of warriors and a superior set of aggressive behaviors, could maintain numerical advantage over several generations even when presented with competition from Cervicius rubrum Lee, a social species utilizing a laborer caste for harvesting and nest-tending. A comparison of the competitive fitness of the two species was conducted in a field trial.
Methods and Materials
The two populations were selected from original colonies that have been in continuous culture for eighty-seven consecutive years. The experiment was conducted under normal field conditions in late Fall at our field laboratory in Pennsylvania. Sample populations from each species were released on the periphery of the experiment site and were allowed to aggressively interact over a three-day period of observation and recording.
Results
Evaluation of competitive displacement ability was based on observed mortality during the observation period and on measures of territorial resource acquisition by the subject species. Interactions occurring in the field resulted in high mortality for both subpopulations. Competitive displacement of C. ruffus by M. azuli supports the hypothesis.
Discussion
The ability of M. azuli to supercede suggests a competitive advantage inherent in a non-laborer caste dependency. This appears to corroborate the first principle of biosocial organization, the egalitarian axiom (Jefferson et al. 1776). It must be conceded, however, that this experiment in itself may prove insignificant as a test of the hypothesis. Accordingly, we have committed ourselves to further study of the hypothesis based on the results reported herein.
(Once you have finished the assignment, you may want to look at this earlier draft of this article. But don't click on this link until you have worked through the exercise!)